opinion

The State We're In Shifting Sand By David F. Moore Executive Director New Jersey Conservation Foundation Much talk in government and press circles of this stat< we're in lately has centered on what's happened to oui oceanfront beaches. Generally, that's because there i! less distance between buildings and the ocean than then § used to be Accordingly, more and more money is being spent t< recycle sand by putting it back on the beaches. Migrating sand makes beaches The high-water line moves wit! every wave, sometimes im percept mly, sometimes, wit! nor'easters. rapidly. Sand moves away from the beach ir the winter and toward it in summer When people build things on the shoreline, lots of things happen, most of them the opposite of w hat's intended For example, rock jetties are built to stick out into the ^ qcean and trap sand That's fine on one side of a jetty as ' tn?Mittoral currents wash by, either north or south, depending on where one stands along the coastline.' But the sand trapped by jetties doesn't drift along to where it normally would go Sand robbery happens that way SEAWALLS ARE A PROBLEM TOO. As the beach washes away from the wall, the slope of the ocean bottom changes, making waves hit the wall harder Sooner or late* the wail gives way, and so does whatever it was supposed to be protecting Dunes protect beaches if they are allowed to do their thirjg, which is to move back and forth with the vagaries of the ocean All barrier beaches wash over from time to time. With less sand, rising ocean levels, and lots of buildings where the dunes used to be, the probability of overwashing increases all the time. So it's only natural that we want to put more sand between our beachside buildings and the ocean. But playing with the ocean's powr is a very expensive game. Sand pumped by dredge to make a beach wider may stay there only a few hours, or a few months at best, pending the arrival of another storm. Yet sand is essential to feeding our multimillion-dollar tourist economy. Fortunately, sand recycling is not too much of an environmental problem. After all, that's what the ocean dc*s anyway. But it certainly is an economic problem. WE SHOULD BE THINKING about the future, either distant or near, when the ocean creates a beach where houses once stood. Maybe that's where dunes should be, instead of houses which tend to be rebuilt for future redestruction. Obviously, in the long run, there's got to be a better way of dealing with beach erosion than pumping money, in the form of sand, from the ocean floor to the beach so the ocean can take it back again. Which brings us to an ongoing political problem in New Jersey People who don't live along the beach, or who don't have monetary or who don't have monetary interests there, outnumber those who do in this state. Thus there's a certain reluctance among uplanders to fork over money to coastal people, over and over again, for what is at best temporary relief^ 1 've heard cost estimates ranging up to $500 million for a complete coastal fix. sandwise. But a temporary one, to be sure. There have been bond issues in varying amounts of millions for coastal beach repairs, and probably more will be forthcoming Another approach to this problem is for those making money from coastal tourist trade, such as restaurant and motel owners, to pay some kind of special tax toward beach repairs The size of the economic load carried by the recreational business calls for protecting beaches, aside from the environmental reasons. But I'm waiting for society to agree to pay owners of wrecked beachfront buildings for their loss, and then keep the waterfront natural Dunes would soon reform, and nature would go right on doing what's inevitable anyway, but at no further cost to taxpayers. W* »«v IU1 UIVI v u.)l iv UJApajClO,

( >; HrMit Y 1 Ewy Wedi»««Uy By Th. S..WW Corporator, P.O. Bo* 430 Cap« May Coort Hcmim. N.J. 08210 Joseph R. Zelnik Editor > Bonnie Reina General Manager Gary L. Rudy Advertising Director John Dunwoodv Special Promotions Director Darrell Kopp Publisher SeowovtCoip 1984 All tights irwvrd All property rights ioi thr •ntife contents ol this publicotion shall be the pioprrty of the Sea wave Corp. No port hereof may be reproduced without prioi writt DEADLINES News & Photos ThursdayAdvertising : Friday — 3 P.M. Classified Advertising Friday — 3 P.M. 465-5055 For New}; or Advertisihg Information nl5?'r'R'L'n* •d,rrt,r.r* n"r,,h.' |,ul,,''hrr> "f ,hr hkrai.d am» I.AMT.H** Hill be mpnnMhlr ur lielil. fur mUinfurmelirin misprint* l»P>wr»phir«l errwre. etc in ens i.*ui - Thi- editor re*rr*rt th. nvhl lurdil em Irtlrr ur artirlr* .ubmiltrj fur publication . /' Wowrr lounthip V. LANTERN T i PuMUhed Evory Wednesday By The Seaweve Corporation 7 P.O. Boa 430 Cape May Court Hou~, tiJ WtlO

• I ve Been Making Money For 65 Years And During All That | . Time The Economy Has Never Been Just Right'...'

— s , I — . ; Our Readers Write YVZ • 1 Warming t 'Fireside' 4 To the Editor; j 1 Operation Fireside for celebration of Thanksgiving Day by and for the Coast Guard Recruits at the U.S. Coast £ Guard base in Cape May was again a happy and satisfying \ success for all concerned. j Families coming into the Coast Guard chapel conveyed f just as mush enthusiasm and joy as the young men and t women in their good looking uniforms, who were to be £ their dinner guests. i It was a delightful experience to be there and take part in this show of community hospitality. A morning-after check with some of the host families t convinces me that "Operation Fireside" should be con- | tinued so long as it is possible and we have recruits in the £ neighborhood. They need this encouragement and knowledge that there is a world outside of the Coast Guard f gate. . We will be repeating this program for the coming < Christmay Day liberty for another group of recruits and will welcome your cooperation. We would like to thank all s the media, station WWOC and others who have been so } kindly involved, and, of course, your own publication. Gertrude M. Reiss Red Cross Chairman f

The Golden Edge Best Laid Plans By Dorothea F. Cooper Our "specialist" physician does make appointments and his secretary gives you a printed card with time and date of your next one to prove it. " You stick it on your refrigerator, along with other . memos of future engagements and you are reminded every time you open the fridge. Until at last the final day comes»,Your appoi itment is at 2.30 but you arrive at doctor's office early so that, if there should be any kind of traffic problem, you will be sure to be there on time. When you get there, a number of people are already seated and deep into the assorted reading matter. ( Wonder what time their appointments are. ) You take a . seat, smile a bit at the person seated next to you, and try to relax. THE PIPED-IS MUSIC is pretty loud. Whoever turns it on must figure that a problem with the eyes also includes a hearing defect. Patients go in and patients come out, and yoy are still waiting, looking at your watch from time to time as the minute hand makes rounds Cor more than a half hour past your appointment. Finally you are ushered into a small examining room where you sit patiently next to another room of the same from which the conversation is maddeningly too low to be heard distinctly. When your turn comes and your examination is finished, all the inconvenience and annoyance you experienced over when the dear doctor smiles and says "Everything looks fine. Come b^k again in six mor.ths." On the other hav our family physician does not make appointments. You write your name on a pad in the waiting room and the first one on it is the first served. But play it smart and get to the office very early to be the one on the list before doctor arrives - only to discover that at least seven other persons have had the same idea and are sitting deep into their own thoughts, or reading the same assorted literature indigenous to waiting rooms. YOU SEE A FRIEND across the room who smiles and tries to make a little polite conversation over the piped-in music which in this case isn't too loud. Everyone looks up and you immediately run out of talk material. This is a routine check-up, and since you sometimes forget things between visits you want to tell or ask doctor about, you have cannily written them on a piece of paper. thinking, eh? You sit in one of many cubicles until doctor comes in, stethescope a-dangle, all smiles and radiating good He says "Mrs. Cooper, how have you been?" And then it hits you. You forgot the' paper that is lying at on the kitchen table.

-Frustrated Vibraphonist - Whither Charles Aznavour? — — — W

By JOE ZELNIK. I've had a number of complaints as a result of last week's "Zelnik Vacationing" photo Some people say I bear little resemblance to the bla- k haired male identified as me in the picture. They claim 1 really have gray hair fluffed across the top of my baid head. 1 say such people are perfectionists who have no place in Cape May County, where a service promised tomorrow really means in a couple months. These are the kind of demanding malcontents who will read about Philadelphia using prefabricated concrete to build a bridge in three weeks and wonder why Stone Harbor's will take 12 months. Let's dispense with one charge right now: that I only chase younger women. I will date Joan Collins, who is exactly my age. any time. AfcFOR THE ACCUSATION' that I am preoccupied with lookmg younger than I am : It is true that 1 have been taking some extraordinary measures in an attempt to slow the aging process. I am using an anti-wrinkle liquid that, applied morning and night, is guaranteed to practically eliminate my laugh lines. To be honest, I haven't noticed any results on the lines yet, but the swirls on the fingers I use to apply it have disappeared. I guess if things get tough, I can always be a safe cracker. Please don't think my search for youth is mere narcissism. Truth is, if I can just look younger, I have a shot at replacing the missing Hope Arvanitis on Channel 40. { KNOW THE AGING PROCESS can't be stopped. I just packed for a vation and. while I used to stuff all my toilet articles in one shaving bag, now I take two. The second is filled with pills, potions, vitamins, etc. Despite that, I had been feeling really young until 1 heard an Avalon police officer explain to the chamber of commerce that police should be able to retire at age 50 because of premature aging caused by tension. I'm aware how tough it is being an Avalon police officer, coming face to face with steely-eyed surfers who insist on killing themselves on 12th Street. Then I began to reflect on some of jny tensest moments — waiting to see if Court House.attorney Fred Schmidt would ever return my phone calls. I'm a hypochondriac and the more the policeman talk-

ed. the worse I lelt. By tne time ne finished, two people in their 70s had to help me to my car. I DROY E HOME at 18 miles' an hour, made a left turn from the right-hand lane, went in the house and sat in the dark listening for hours to my record (the county library s,.actually) of Charles Aznavour singing "Yesterday, When I Was Young." Aznavour and I are about the same age. I began to wonder why he hadn't made a new record lately Dead probably ... If you think your about age too much, you can really get depressed. You remember all the high hopes you had and think about how little you've achieved, how you'll never reach the heights you'd hoped for. I can recollect how badly I wanted to be a vibraphonist in a beauty parlor, but no one would listen to me. Failing that, I turned to tension reduction using the only other piece of machinery' I could handle: my typewriter. DON'T THINK you're reading Dr. Beitman's column by mistake, but some scientists say that laughter is one of the best ways to cut tension and anxiety. Studies have proven that hearty laughter relaxes the arteries and muscles and stimulates most of the large internal organs: the diaphragm, thorax, abdomen, heart, lungs, liver. Thus a good laugh leaves the body in "a cleansing calm." When I first applied for this job, I was struck with the inordinate number of unhappy people in this county. I remember, for example, that the general manager and publisher interviewing me wept when I told them how much I'd like to be paid. I was determined to write a humor column that would make people feel better. Occasionally that has happened But little did I realize the side-effects. Lines shortened outside doctors' offices and pharmacies. Burdette had empty beds. The depressed medical industry couldn't afford free flu shots. PANIC OVER increased healthiness brought together factions never before able to agree: MDs and DOs neurologists and psychiatrists, orthopedits and chiropractors. They formed a committee this week, came to me ascribed their plight, and politely explained that if i didn t stop trying to be funny, they'd break my patellas Don t miss my column next week on the debt crisis in Argentina.