Ill

¥

fablf gf ' Susan and the' Daughter and the Granddaughter s

fcr GEORGE ADE

Obcc there was a fali-bk>wo Wild ■tack, registered fn the Family Bible m Ssaan Mahaly. Her Pa divided bis time between Mtoctine at a Toll-Gate and defend»J*tte Military Reputation of Andy The family dwelt In what was then MCarded by Cambridge. Mass., as the *t Zone of Semi-Culture, vix., t County. Pennsylvania. 1 wore Linsey-Woolsey from r to Saturday. She never had 1 with her Venns de Milo >hy and she did not even snst Women had Nerves, n she was seventeen she had a n tike a Member of the Turnfihe knew how to Card and Weave Dye. Also she could make Loose la a kettle out In the Open Air. never fell down on her Saltread. Her Apple Butter was

>1.

ft was commonly agreed that she •fcM mak» some Man a good Hoose•wasf'BJ, for the was never sickly and ■dwH stay on her Feet sixteen hours

*U» a Stretch

she was beginning to look ^ dawn the Pika for a regular Fellow, la ths year 1840. the Lass of aeveaw*» failed to get her Hooke on MM roaming specimen of the Oppm «Oe Gander was In danger of being d about as an Old Maid. Celli listed with Arson and Mac-

Wild Honey. They c c. Coffee. Arrived at the Jam pin* Off . they settled down among the Mink and Mask-Rat* Rufus hewed out and Jammed together a little two by twice Cabin with -the Flue .running up the outside, ft looked ornery enough to be the Birthplace of almost any ful American. The Anophelea Mosquito was waiting for the Pioneer* In th old ChlUaand-Fever days.-no blamed It on the Female of the Spe dee. Those who had the Shakes allowed that they t ere being Jarred by the Hand of Providence. When the family ran low on Quinine, all be had to do was to book op and drive liny miles to the nearest Towa. where be would trade the Furs for Necessities such as Apple Jack and Nary Twist, and possibly a few Luxuries such as Tea and Salt On one of these memorable Trips to the Store, a Mood which combined Sentiment and reckless Prodigality seised npon him. He thought of the brave Woman who was back there In the loneaon Shack, shooing the Prairie Wo1vl_ •way from the Cradle, and he resolved to reward her. With only three GUIs of Stone Fence under the Wsmmns. be spread his Wild-Cat Currency on "the Counter and purchased a *6 Clock, with jig-saw '•filaments, a shiny coat of I Varnish, and a Bonquct of Pink Roses on the door. Susan burst into Tears when she •aw it on the Wall, alongside of the Turkey Wing, and vowed that she had married the Best Kan In the World. Twenty years later. Jennie, the first begotten Chick at the Log House In the Clearing, had matured and mar fled, and was living st the CountySeat with Hiram. Money-Changer and Merchant. Railroad Trains, Side-Bar Buggies. Coel-Oi. lamps, and the aril War had come along with a Rush and dlsarruged primitive CondiUons. The Frontier bad :etreated away

Kansas

In the very township where, of late, the Beaver bad toiled without Hindrance and the Red Fox dug his hole

sed to be an Early Rummy, but be could lift a and he would stand without hitched, so Susan nailed him third time be came snooping ad the Toll-Gete. v *nfhs dtd not have a Window to •tot or a Fence to lean on. But re to no Poverty In sny Pocket of tlaiversa until Wealth arrives _^«tos to get Ljggy. ^-fwpstn-towght she playing in ,»aro Lock to anaro a 81r-Fk>ot*r who • a good Squirrel Rifle and could rassle all Comers, e Hills of Pennsylvania were beag congested, with Neighbors not • than two or three miles apart, so nuns and his Bride decided to hit a New Tiall into the Dark Timber and grow up with the Boundless West. Relatives of tbe Young Couple ataked them to a team of Pellets, a Mnley Cow. a Bird Dot of dubious An «**ry. an Aa*. and a Skillet, and suited them over the Divide coward •be-perilous Frontier, away out yen-

*r la Hllnoy

•t was a Hard Life. As they trun,4 slowly over tbe rotten Roads, to 4|1 the Land of Promise, they bad •argeij on Venison. Pralp« J^hlcken. Quail. Black Bass. Her

Coro Oysters and going *o see "East

Lynne."

Hiram was in rugged Health, having defended the flag by Proxy during the recent outcropping /rf Acrimony between the Devotees of Cold Bread and the s’.avea of Hot Biscuit Tbe Substitute had been perforated beyond repair at tbe Battle of Keneaaw Mountain, proving that Hiram made no mistake in remaining behind to

tend Store.

When Jennie moved in where she could bear the Trains whistle and began io sport a Cameo Brooch, she could barely remember wearing a Slip and haring Stone Braises. Hiram was Near, but be would loosen up a trifle for his own Fireside. The fact that Jennie was his Wife gave her quite a Steading with him. He admired her for having made such a Success of her Life, . They dwelt in a two-story Fruno with countlee* Dewdads and Thingumbobs tacked along the Eaves and Scalloped around the Bay Windows. The country people who came In to see the Eighth Wonder of the World uaed to stand in ailent Awe. breathing through their Noses. i »he Lawn, surrounded by Geraniums, was a Cast-Iron Deer which seemed to be looking at the Court House in s startled Manner, was that kind of a Court House. In her Front Room the daughter of Rufus and Susan had wonderful Wax Flowers, sprinkled with Diamond IXist: a What-Not bearing Mineral Specimens. Conch-Shells, and a Star

iinMisloMta TW1-

t tabo

L C*S!. Poc^.Tua

Kttr.iV'

to tt- ev*r

ch Unx id Th

r faatmt FlfL owned I Coon tees BMdoognn of B1V

tad come betw.-eu him The Situation became

•ore and more tense and ftnallr. one day in Egypt, within plain sight of Us majestic PjromUA he kicked Precious ever mo hsro and raised quits a Swel-

BEAT

The Legal Adviser said Dektn was

too good for such a Fi •nd.

la Vienna, (hough, that was where he went so ter that Separation beBthsi had decided to take an WO, 000 Pearl Necklace she had seen in a Window, it w*. easily worth that much, and she felt sure she coaid get

f ft- Tea - iwre {|t in without paying Duty. She had

boa very successful at bringing

ktttthrttr things Home

She could hardly believe her Ear. P ft- Mas , when Hubert told her to forget it and IP •: back up sad come out of tbe Spirit •Jril Tnsx cm World and slight cm the Planet Earth. ytetlte-- He had been Hearties* on previous K-catic.cs. bat this was ths Bret time

i-ier fc

i

► vruiBom. ( f 5 ‘* tw LV ► wtc- Wo

rosa with the Loom Change Ethel was simply determined ve that Necklace, but the unfeeling aelp triad to kid her out of the No

HO SETTER WAY THAN SRAISing HA* WCN DEVISED. mg

tpsclaWy Ebejid Fowl That ,* Nm »• TdMtor to Could »• Wk-t—f g. Proporod to Tlw. W|ff OeiiK.

way of cook |

tng rather tough meat*, as the 1

tbs meat and I

all the noorishmstot to prwenc-:

the gravy. A Cowl that to loug. j should always bo cooked la this »*> Taka a casserole jmA large esoegfa u I hold tbs fowl. Cover the hotloai »ai |

slices of fat haooo. *44 thick sik. ots and tarnlpa and ptu ia I

the fowl. Cover the dish and let u ] cook on tke top of Iks stove (or i: minutes. Tssn add a pint of hot »» f tar. Place In ths oven. Let it .. tt I mer an hour or longer, neoordlng w |

the age and sise of tbe fowl,

boon will be needed 'er an old bird |

Utah the bird Put ths vsgrt around the dirt and pwr orer gravy made from the stock.

Kidneys which may be bought (o: |

one. two or throe cents apiece. :

man, even la the ctty. make.a cfce*; I

and delicious nipper, luncheo breakfast dirt either grilled or .( To stew the kidnaps scald, skit

cut them in halves, take out the small |

hard piece and rub la aeaaoncd

Heat a HtOn dripplug in wnall cas. . role, pul In the kidneys and fry then | brown. Take them out and keep warts I oc. a plate. Chop a small celon. in ■

in the cassero'e until brown, i i'Ule flour and brown. Add i

_ 1 fiavw I Kidneys that are left I

■•Tali

The Groo.n Wort a Swallow-Tail.

FUh—also xomc HsW^oth Furniture, i The Groom wore s Swalio very slippery and upholstered with Most of those proseat had

I *“«• ot the Dross Sea. ^Is the Fire

and f ^id H f«??s*V^ h * r t i*, BUck 8nk I ,l(le Compaalon. the Geatletaan wear and pald tor tbm Crayon BslsrgcmenU | in» one always had Ccrta. and the

Wood Engraving caught him la the

of her Parents. Jennie did not have the Face to Bone him for anything more, but she longed In secret and

Hiram suspected.

Jennie was a Soprano Not a regular Soprano, but a Country-Town Soprano. of tbe kind often used for augmenting the Grief at s Funeral. Her voice came from a point about two inches above tke Right Eye. She bad assisted a Quartet to do things to "Juanita." and sometime* she toased oat blitfa aboni wishing the could practice at Home. Jennie was a Nice Woman but she did need Prac-

tice.

Although Hiram was tighter than the Bark of a Sycamore, he liked to have other Women envy the Mother of his Children When he spread himself from a Shin-Plaster, he expected a Fanfare of Trumpets.

net of striking a Lady la the Face and saying “Curao you!" Tbe Feeiicg at the County-Beat was that Frances had taken a Des-

perate Chance.

The Caterer with Colored Help in White Gloves, the ruby Punch sos pected of containing Liquor, the Jap nnese LMtlerns attached to the Maples, the real Lace in the Veil, the guttering Array of Pickle-Jars, and a weUdeflned Rumor that most of the imported Ushers hsd been Stewed, gave the agitated Hamlet something to Mat about for many and many n day. Tbe Bachelor of Arte grabbed off by the daughter of Jennie and the granddaughter of Snsan was the owner of Real Estate in the congested Pnslnees District of a Town which came Into Public Attention later on I through tbs efforts of Frank Chance His front name was Willoughby, but

tbe sfaud She hsd 1 to pulp a fi

Her i vorite 1 Frances, the 1 of tbe Wee

more, there had bees hope | -aipaliblUty. in all the time • together, they never bad ] \t© agree on a Turkish clga-

1 Home-Blaster said _h on Hubert to get ^er

\*s. Tbe Decree would be I she hoped so and to I t along, as she bad quite

It took him a long tine to unwind eould Dig If he thought he was boost-

ing bis own Game.

By stealthy short-weighting of the Country Trade and holding out on the Assessor, he succeeded In salting away numerous Kopecks In one corner of

the Safe.

While in Chicago to buy his Winter Stock, be bargained for two days and Anally bought a Cottage Mclodeon. with tbe Stool thrown In. Jennie would alt up and pomp for Hours at. a time, happy in tbe knowledge that she bad drawn the Capital Prise In the Lottery of Hymen. In the year 1886 there was same Church Wedding st the County-Seat. Frances, daughter of Hiram and Jen nle, had knocked the Town a Tviner when she came home from the F emale College wearing Bang* and tot ug a Tenni* Racquet. All tbe local Oallan-. with CocoaOil In their hair anf. Ring* on their Cravats, tacked into tbe Shrubbery. Hiram had bought her about $1,800 worth of Hauteur at the select Institution of Learning All she bad to do waa look '•! a Villager through her Nose Speca and he would curl up like an Autumn Leaf. A Cum from Chicago came to aee her every few week*. Ilia Trousers seemed to be choking

matter what she happened to be thinking at tbe time Part of Bute Stree* had been wished on to Willoughby. He was afraid to sell, not knowing bow to reinvest. So be sat back and played safe. With growing Delight he watched »he Unearned Increment piling up on every Corner. He began to ace that he would be fairly busy.all his life. Jacklug up Kents. Tbe Red-Brick FTortross to which he conducted Frances had Stone Steps In fron* and a secret Entrance for lowly Tradespeople at the rear. Willoughby and his wife bed tbe high courage of Youth and the Flnan rial Support of all the Money Spenders along State Street, so they started In on Period Decoration. Each room In the House was supposed to stand for a Period Some of them stood for a good deal. A few of tb* Periods looked like Exclamation Points. The young couple disregarded the Toll-Gste Period and the l-onfabln Period, but thsy worked in every one of tbe Louies nntil the Gilt Furniture

gave out.

The driighu-d Caller at the House i beside tbe lake would pass from an I East Indian Corridor through au Early 1 colon isl Ante-Room into a Japanese • Boudoir sad, after resting Hi* list. |

School I After she l Ball-Rofim and « attack Europe fi Viper c She i wm Hubert. I iishman. and t turned the Bay. While eomc were still in the fi to practice tbe a ties. He Induced her b and go cruising ij ran can whei Apartment i At Monte Cartel borrowing 3,000 f elan Grand E at bucking the 1 the Duke a fore end his 1 The Lawyer Pup. beyond ell £ Cairo. Egypt. 1 Dark Chapter of 8

: h«i be started In'to Pik“. 1 ted a mOOd Tarmro of Robicg and rtond* as a Compromise. Ethel be e wise to the Fp« that she had

•d out wltL a Wad.

tilto she was pulling a dally Sick ache in the hope of bringing him , w. the Maharajah of Umstopagu* 1

and she never had been tae ^ ^ smooth. Recurn the kidneji I

Woman since. to the nan and simmer f II who kid COB. CICBIIK tor I r*“ “t

miUco. Etk.1 liBWl, ».« ct j

s “-—I i aoa MW) \ wars * ^ brown gravy. : KW. b«.-c tk, B,.,„ ; ^ordt- I

need and apUt and brushed with | They *bonld W served c

cither well seasoned or with a deni 1

Veal and ham pie, a very popuin I and Inexpensive Engll.h dirt. Is m*^

as follows:

One pound veal cutlet, four ounce* I bacon or ham, two hard-briled eggk F pastry, seasoned floor and mushroom- I Make a seasoned flour by mlxiot | one tablespoonful of flour, < spoonful of sal:, onetoalf teat of peeper; add a little grated rind <’ J a le. an and a pinch of caj tbe meat into medium pie tLe Sour and put into a <J baking d'sh. Peel the musl put them In the dtoh. Pool water to three-quarters All Uc di»h i and cover the top of th* d»rt 0»' ! with pie cruat. Maks s hole in th* center of the pastry Put It into tb« 1 oven and bake for an hour.

[cited Smoker*. men of eastern extbe most disconcerting orld until you are used |nk you will direct him. by pulllrg a rein that

to that a

large eyes and larger over Us own neck the eyes But the csmel't progress les unaltered, ilonable heart. |um»n weaknessIr tobacco One of [by Arabs ia taming t kind of cigar mouth and in* |y-rolled cigar. A* |rtartE to draw. It docile, c-d quickje smoke and emit The one draw[is that the know-l-onflrmed smoker without his ri-

Stuffed Candy. Pvrchaae a pounu of frort mar»ti maHowa and cut them in two with thscissor*. Do not attempt to pull them apart, for this cannot be dor with succsm, as they ere too sticky. they should be t ut hortiontaUy, a> they Fook better that way whet stuffed, tsei peel walnuts or pecaar make delirious filling and pieces of h» are also good After the fllllng to put on the bottom portion, pres* the top part over it and this will readily ad

—

1

: m..b The Pompadour «a* protected __ ' by a Derby of the Fried-Egg aperies, would be escorted Into tne Italian ; It whs the kind that Joe Weber hi-lped Renaissance Drawing-Room j to Veep in Public Kemembranci' Hut : the Hostess. Prom Ibis exquisite i In 1886 |a was de Rlgrur. au Fait. Apartment, which ate up one yeaiy's and a In Mode I Rent of a popular Buffet near via . Frances would loud the accursed | Buren Street, there could be obtained : aty Cbap Into tbe blgb Cart and ex : « raviahlng glimpse of the Turkish hi bit him up and down all the Ileal- Cosy-Comer beyond, including the j

* Local Gallants. With Cocoa OH in Their Hair and Rings < Their Cravats Backed Into the Shrubbery.

dence Thoroughfares.

On nearly every Front Porch some Girl whose Father was not interested j in tbe First National Bank w uuld peer | cut through the Morning Glories at the Pageant and then writhe like ac

Angie-Worn.

The Wedding was tbe biggest thing that bad struck tbe town since Forepaugh stopped over on bis wav from Peoria to Decatur Frances was not a popular Girl, on account of bring so Uppish, so those who could col fight their way Into tbe Church climbed up and looked through the Windows

Battle-Axes and tbe Red Lamp. Frances soon began to hob-nob with j

tbe moat delicatessen Circles, inrind- i

ing Families that dated back to tbe

Fire of 1871.

She was not at all Diray. even \ when she looked down from the Moun • tain Peak at her yappy Birthplace.

It.OOP feet below.

Willoughby turned out to be a aattofactory Housemate lit* Voltage was not high, but be always ate Feas i • Ilk a Fork and neier pulled at the i-«-a»b whrn taken to a Uuaicai* In front of each Ear ho carried a neat Am ef Human IvJ. so that tt:

Bancna Salad. Thia to a very noartohing dirt, cask* i prepared at a few minutes' aotice J Peel and scrape ripe bananas Cut each one In two pieces and cut off tbe sharp end. making them look like a croquette. Roll them in chopped nuts of any kind-either peanuts hickory nuts or walnuts L*r on a leaf of lettuce and serve with a IKtls Fr-nch dressing containing a gteni deal of ollvae. Casserole of Rice e"d Meat. Two cupfuls Chopped meat, peepw I and cayenne, one-quart-t cupful brea or cracker crumbs onehall teespoonful sail celery sail one beaten egg. hot water or stock to mol»tm Line x buttered bakiuK cooked rice one-quarter inch Pack mixture In and cover with tv* Steam or bake 80 to 4* minutes in vert on a platter and aurround »' tomato sauce. Silk Handkerchiefs. Silk handkerchiefs should hf washed In a w arm lather made * | pure soap Thts should be blutd. »• should tbe rinsing water. Roll UI ’ . tightly to a doth and iron the ; ketvbtef. between linen or the) •HI i torn yellow

tediXm^a^~

I

J

She Had a Tale of Woe Calculated to Puij

- French flalad. stalks of endive with Rocque-, fort rhacaa. let marinate to French! dressing *0 minutes, eltp a red peppea ritic atound each stalk, and lay oa grvvr lettuce leaven. Add a little c« the Fteavb dressing before ■•.rvIcjB