LAUGHING HIMSELF AWAY. What SaaBird Gao*!

»-7 I

Joe Dorfalloser. of Wrigbutown. Hocks oouDty, U laughing himself to deaUi over the Ncabope extenaioo of the Reading ruilruad' which runs b/ bii farm. Three months ago be weighed ire pouoda. The Ana train paned hU farm the Aral of Marcli. Durhllugrr has laagbed ao much aiooo then that be now weighs 110 pounds. The doctors are i-unied, and Durhlingrr's friends are awaiting the rrault with min gird feelings of alarm and curtoaitj-. Dothllnner is about flflreight rearm of age. Re

la a nail re of German;.

On the llrsf of March. ISJO. the Xcwbope estension of the Reading ndlroad commenced. This ran diractij past Durbllngerti farm, with a station at Walton, about value at once, and Durhlinger began to grin. Ail of bis talk was of the Improved value which the extension would give his land, and how his poalerit; would benefit Then he began tu neglect his ov and took to watching the railroad theirs. He was so tickled that be took sev-

eral of the railroad men

nothing per week, and did nothing but laugh and talk about the lni|in.vemrnt 'itb litem all daj. 11; degraw his mirth

a When the exten-

farm be auddenlv became ulsed with laughter. From that lime • nothing but alt on hU j>orch and

work

at a dis- >« rcfnwb- '* control. ‘I

After a train has ]sowed be Inaprals the track, and laughing .juietl; to himself, rr-

ouse chuckling, to await the

ig of tlie next. He knows the timetable b; heart, and ran tell In a min

train should be due off his fai

He allowed ever) thing to go to .... tlie farm, aiwl the watching for and laugh* ~ tbe trains became his uoe atworblng He began to lose Aeab, and Is gradual); la-coming a skeleton. His wife hopes that the novelty of the Ibiug may wear off, and that her husband will regain his normal

He dues not laugh now quite

n as be did, but his Interest in e..._ of the road remains as great. Mon- . he walked eighteen miles to testify fi the railroad company In a case of tnwpai

-Philadelphia Record.

theory on which Ra patrons have hitherto gone has beeo U facture. Probably this Is tire ease with rakers of the lurid light ibject by a rase heard at the Wooli com plaints tudiliun of i « the local block |rulpy

on the tbrground merely "froated.” Another wiluras metniunrd the disquietlug fact that while the “pulpy" uranges cost twelve shlllitigs a larx, those sold foe marmalade only fetched four ahllliuga. The defendant was let off with a warning. as there was no proof that he knew the oranges to he as bad as they undoubt-edly-were. For the public the important point is to discover what proportion of their matutinal marmalade Is made up eg the “black pulpy i— “ - '" London Telegraph. its to lUostraUrrs. Get In the habit of carrying a small —*-h book, and of picking up ciisraeterJottlngs in tire street, on Ore ferry. In in the audience at the Ibe-

PAY OF FRENCH TEACHERS.

In France the teaching profnaloo Is much •perslocked. For private teachir no diploma is required, but practically b needed, for a teacher with a diploma 1* always preferred. Ladies are aomrtimes attached to large scholastic establish met solely for the purpose of receiving the latives of the pupils. For their services Urey arc paid *fty francs a month i

their Itoard.

Secretaries and readers are pahl from CtaO) to 3J0 (MU) franca a month. Their hours are long and their duties fatiguing. Interpreters get two francs an hour. " the post of interpreter the candidate get herself Into good relations with the hotels, for it la here that '

chiefly required.

In a lower class of life respectable women

can earn ten or fifteen francs

taking children out for a walk every day and thus relieving hard worked- mothers and saving them the expeuse of sum These women are not, property .peaking, teachers, but they often talk some foreign language, and are often required to do so in order that their little charges may gain The public ftclmoU are divided into primary. secondary and superior. In the primary tlie law! 1-r.ta to be obtained are f' of Inspectors. There are five iusprcMre of

boarding schools and Gveuf it * The salary is a minimum of (fcOU) a year, and a maximum < (f 1,100). w ith a bi annual rise ■

Tlie Inspectors also IUkl,a year for extra .

Faria itself Ibcr

primary i The salary

PRICE 3 CENTS.

ODDS AND ENDS.

Pcaci.cs are not a favorite except with a few animals, though rabbits fane; them. Never cut your coma with a sharp Instrumeot This la at best but a temporary

relief.

The Ctilted States baa referred thirtythree International disputes to arbttratkm during the present century. All the Irttrre of the alphabet appear In In the following aaulencr. ‘The a a tel brow o lux Jump, o,

risible la-low- the

deople dis-

AJ1 Rooms Face Ocean. Cafe SSttadlied. FOB SALE-A lew Choice Bailding; Lots ““i** t-lty water.lias.

prec of tbeir bands man's coat when its wearer take quick memoranda of «ucn be is leaning forward see the tine of liar shoulder sod arm will iiul bow much of bis neck Is visible this line. Get the |«*e of his brad when It is thrown back, when lie 1s asleep, reading the paper or tumbling in hia pocket " hia arm la forward or hack, a nuklea In bU coat front, ill be. tiodaty men, laboring men, bualnere ill all have dUferent ttitudea. ways of dis posing of their hands and feet and wearing their clothes. The more you make careful study of three things and are able ' express them, the more Original an you will become. Make studies of the hang of a lady', drapery, the act of her u or hat. the Hues of her which she carrire her muff, parcels, umbrella, bow she gets no or off of . insure a gutter or nogs a doorbell. -Art Amateur.

with a six-mouths'-old Infant in her l were about to enter the Austin Upera House to see the performance ooe night, when the doorkeeper suddenly said: "" pardon, madam, bat you can't U insider" ' Very well." said the lady, “ao much I ter for ma. You Just take care of t little fellow till the play Is over—and, the way, there's the milk bottle in case should cry.”—Texas Siftings.

^Fair 1 den—How savagely that cow Hayseed-It's your red parasol.

f Ihe.-eare six Iw-'x-rtors of glrb :bools and three of Infant schools

<*1.3U0) a year, in

There is also an inspector of tlie class fo bookkeeping and modern languagre. li w hich the salary, Uigrlber with the ex pensea, amounts to T “UU francs (tl.HU). am one land of lus|a-ctor of schools for dress making and cutting out. Three schools In the suburbs of Farts, and the salary ,ror The applicants

t hold the high-

li. 3.UU0 fra. must be t, tblny-flve estdiplon

They can all receive pensions, calculated afier the rules applied to the employes of the prefecture of the Seine, that is, after thirty years' service they have the right to a peuslou equal to half their salary. This sum L deducted from tbeir salaries at the rate of 30 jier cent. The teachers in primary schools must also bold the highest diplomas. exrept iu the infant schools, which require a simple diploma and certificate of aptitude. Here the salaries for the teachere are from l MO (1300) to 2,500 franca (I500K for the directresses, from 2.750 (1550) to 3,800 franca (1750). Promotion can ojily he obtained after three years of service, and becomes a right after live. Good posts are those of adult school teachers, there being seventeen school, for sdult women In Faria There are sixty drawing schools throughout Paris and tlie provinces, hut the salary of the teacher, here L not fixed by government. These schools are excellent, and very good places in which to liegin the study of art.— New York Sun.

It was aluut 11 o'clock, on the elevated os-1 —slid elsewhere. At Twenty-thlnl street two pretty young .-omen In good clothes came aboard. The morning rush was past, but still the ar was full of comfortable business men studiously devoted to their news)ispera Tcred. Our of tlie young women bitched rraelf to a strap w ith an air of familiarity itb the process, the other looked on and • the men with an expression of Intellec■al cariosity, not unmlxed with scorn. “You’ll see Wall street running right up against old Trinity,” laid she of the strap; as if continuing a previous conversation, “then I want to take you through one ~ the big office buildings, butVe'll bare It till papa" Will we have to stand all the way dot- _ thrall *” asked her friend and evident guest Irrelevantly, in soft, clear tones an '

ee yean old has actually bwn

carried off tiy-lth eagle

Hungary. In sight of the father at

A cititrn of St. LouB- Is said

psal living by renting turtles

On dark nights a white light can be seen farther then any other color; on bright nights red takes the first place. Mrs. Worth, the wife of the famous Pa-

goes to prove Jhe truth of an old proverb. lady Burton's revised version of Sir Richard Burton'» translation of the “Arabian Nights" Is the ediuon from which Dora Pedro Is makings

r of flour. Roll U

and U

per crust of idea. It will render the crust

flaky and tender.

A Boston society woman says It la quite a fad among Boston young genUeenen to take up the practice of veterinary surgery. The same thing is noted in Washington. In arraor|date teste steel has generally been found to compete more aoocrmfully with compound armor when the plana were eighteen Inches thick »hsn when they

were only twelve Inches thick.

Previous to tlie emandpotloo act of 1839 Roman Catholics were excluded from corporate offices, from parliament, forbidden to marry Protestants or to carry arms. ■—<

were under various other disabilities. well known that vegetable and anl- ‘ “ -ultablr for cylinder lobri-

cauou. aim recently In France where colza oil was used It was found neceasa-y to burn out the deposits la the porta of the

locomotive cylinder*.

mal oils are ui

going to bed after a day of toil minding her sick and maimed dolls— islids all of them—and her tsea-o-tlful duck, the ooe old quacker that traveled w ith the liens because he had no better Company. The robin «hs( had Inru watching her oat of the corner* of hi* bright rye*, as be ran over the lawn and listened to her prattle, was asleep already Lis head under his wing, and Katie’s heavily on mother's shoulder as aha mdreaaing her. “Now I lay me" lust hern said, with many yawns In between, "**d mamma’s pet had been locked lu ■ugly; but Just as the sleepy eyes were closing she sot suddenly bolt upright. “Mamma.” she said, "I want Johnnie's picture book—that with the lamb*.” “Hush. Katie!" said her mother, the st bit wearily, for the little feet and the

little tongue had ti

moment all

- had never ceased going o, day. “Now we vrtll go

“Not tonight, dearie; It 1* too late.” “Mamma," maid Katie, sitting up very straight ami linking very solemn indeed. “I beard a story of a little girl—ahe was a good little girl—that asked her mamma oust when she was put to bed fur the picture hook with the lambs, and the msrerp's told her she couldn't have It, and-and"— the baby voice fell to an awed whisper and •’ yes grew very big—“in Just—about—

'My. Katie! And what killed her ao quick?" “Because," said Katie with conviction, “because she didn't get the book.”

>; not all the way," replied tbe Nl_ York girl, and then, chaperoning her sex Instead of brr section, abe addedsolto voce, “some of these brutes will have to get out ; Hector si reel—they'll have to give

I think by tbeir hs.ki ud lose money to huc| A gcmlntpiu sitting li amused expression,

they'll stay aboard us but of one ou one of tin u»yiug:

! I knew it was a 1 didn't auppoaa would notice 1L—New York

btogiaphy?" “Yea. Frigbtfi

[htfol exhibition of coooeitr

“How ao?”

“Why. It> all about himself.''-Harper's

■um-udeml his seat. * hereupon bis vis-a-vis succumbed ruefully to moral suasion and gave up hia When tbe girls, with smiling thanks, were seated, tbe southerner wiuktd merrily at her friend and i “If yon nawthin gyuls understood aging yah men they'd behave betlah. Tbe Iron baud iu tlie velvet glove; that’s ■outh'en woman's foW-Ncw York H«

Tbs Thiers Tracks. A giant thief who was compelled a bed of clay mas olswrvid carefully covering up hi* tracks with Band from a bag which be carried for tbe purpoar. "Why do you that?" he was ad offlOer who was biding near by.

only for iKwthumou* fame.' Twenty oruUirie* afterward, when son degenerate workmen of the period wbei excavating fur the penitentiary which wit great propriety was to lie erected ou the spot, they found hb tracks, tbe sand hartng blown away and tbe clay hardened to atone.

cold homin; on iu side, will begin

To get rid of croton bugs take an ordinary paiw-r bag, such as flour comes la. and bait It with almost anything from lo potato skins. Lay the bag •d in a few minutes the bogt flock Into It In great nnmyou think it is about half full approach the, bag noiselessly, ae though drawIng upon a flock of canvas backs, quickly lip the bag Into a standing position, draw the top together and thrust tbe bag into the kitchen range.— Detroit Free Press.

One of our dtixrns wei

xpeuae recently to appear In a dreas suit t a ball at the opera house. Of course he raa anxious to appear in the grand march, for there was where be could sport himaelf. He arrived at tbe hall, however. Just as the march was over. Nothing dsunted | be walked up to the management and re-

' '*■' have It over again.-Bel- "jluZT

faction.—Loulsrllle ComtserdaL

—Harpers Young

Few men were ever fonder of news and goadp than was old Jerry CUabea. Despite this fondness, however, Jerry was not a talker, and rarely took part in conversation other than to ask an occasional question about some point of special Interest. Ooe day J I ry's brother William, who lived some mi Ira away, came to visU him. William bad Lb right hand heavily bandaged. and tfab fact, of course, required an “Burnt it ’most off't Ahe Are f other night," said William. “Ye see. old 'Square Dean's barn got afire, 'o' I went with the rest; but 'tsan't any me. 'boat everything was burnt. If I wax the 'square I'd give that boy arch a lickin' *t be couldn't

stan’."

“•What for?" asked tbe iutereated Jerry. “Why, fur setUn' the barn aflre." was the reply; "but there! I furgot ter tell ye 'bout that pan of '* v - — ■ J '

id—he found a

iwl

•ruin' on tbe ridge pole, and ao, of course,

he had ter shoot at it.

"Wal. the barn winder was open, 'n' the gunwsd went right inter tbe haymow, V Twon't five minutes afore Hwas all a-bbu-tn'. Everybody turned out, and we got out the old boss, 'o' then Bill Treat aaU"— aadao the old man went ou with a long Story, giving every detail of what was door, said sod thought by each ooe wbo

was present at tbe Are.

.When at last the story was ended old Jerry remained for several minutes silently meditating on what be bad heard; then be suddenly looked np sod gravely asked. “Did ye aay whether tbe boy killed tbe owl?”—Youth's Companion.

A young society

> in the of the

the other day. He IsAhaod-

Bfae. however, obstinately refused t

The gtrl c

- wss In the room, arwi she

t ran across the floor. Fur-

thermore, by saying the young a