>1 SIX OCEAN CITY SENTINEL THI'RSDAY. JANUARY 11. IgL — — - - # ^ SIX u BIRTHDAY HONORS Ju birthday cake, with fuur^^ft

Jottings from our schools' (Continual from Page Three) : 1 Si ill io bnd Fred! They went and married! Ami now they're dead. Walter stood nt Twelfth street at ( • midnight. The cloek wn -Diking eight; Ills girl walked off with, another 1 *»y. He was just one 1 our too late. ■' Mary liail a little light, It was well trained, no douht. ' For overytime that George calleil The little lijrht went out. ( SCHOOL HUMOR Peter— Why was Eve (Robert) f • created " I Carl— For Adam's HterdonW Express Company. Sign in Gardiner's window: Hooks for week-ends. ^ Tom— Why docs a sculptor die a most horrible lieath V Mr. S.— Don't know. 'Why ? 1

Tom — Cause lie makes faces an.i basts. 1 Harry— Look at that bow-legged I girl. Her knees art like jftrongSam — Yes. The; 're bawdy ar .|uainted with each other. Scott — Pardon mo Miss, but have \ on "Travels with a Donkey , Clerk— Sorry, sir. hut all stationcry is in the next aisle. Porter in N. Y. — Do you •'ant ".'our suit 1 1 rushed off . John— No. n > B. V. IV- are dirty. Caroline— He calls her "Revenge" and she falls him "Vengence." Mary— Why ? Caroline— Rfv'enjri' is sweet and Vengence i- mine. She— Isn't fclith a |ierfect pirture " Well, she has a pretty g ' The Exception Jones— 1 didn't know you were married. Brown— I'm not. 1 trot that hump on my . head as a child while playing.

The telephone men hat no "soft enap" when etorme tear down the line* In winter time.

Cd PopRoiiale I

I'Wiladelpfi.a. ihn-e Mr. and Mi . William Stewart. ' hnslr.es.- trt-osaete.! at the John J. ' .Foster Realty Agency of this city. I- found in the fact that Mi. Eos- . icr ha- extended his office farilijjllha, by the ul >b inp. formed. o i-i.pie-' i - an olivMr. aii. I Mi-, tiei.it;.' Brown ,0 Mi'lville. While there. Mi - Miriam Brown wa- cnmpelle-- t" ial dergo an operation for appemHi,p .i:is. Friend: -ill be glad to leorn tha: Mis.- Rr.'-wi - recoverring noimal health splendidly. j Miss Emily R. I.yn.-li of this, city, is cnti'i'.aimi'; i.uite a largo party of friends nt her cottage on Wesley Avenue. The true-:- in-. clUlie Mr- I'm--, l ynch. Mrs. R. ('. Smith, Mr.-. Florence Luiuiyv Mi-. J. Bender Moffatt. Mr-. Horry Piatt and George Rotters of Tacony. Philadelphia. Mrs. Th s. Taylor of Willow-: Grove. Mii. Catherine Shaman of Germantow::. and Mi— Christine. Pfughaupt i f New York. Mr. and Mrs. Roy E. Darhv are! i entertaining the tetter's party! Mr. and Mi.-. Harry Litle of Newport. Mr. and Mrs. I.itle propose i to remain in Ocean City for anI other month. Mr. ami Mrs. John DagUesrh have returned from a pleasant

\ isit ampnjr relatives in Germans' 'own. Mrs. Dagfiesch i- rapidly '.'•■rgltig ahead in the realty busiRICHARD LLOYD JONES New York is u crowded town. H.r uliways and elevated railroads In the jam hours of the day ic literally packed sardine-tight . itii human freight. But with all, congestion of millions of : <ople upon a little island, it is r ea.-iest town in the world, to I rate your whereabouts without the aid of a compass or a guide. It is eleven blocks wide .and her cross streets are numbered. New \ .o k - just a great checker board. If you can talk the American tongue, any policeman will help you "find yourself if .you are The other day a pathetic story went the rounds of the press of a Mr. an i Mrs. Joseph Gallo,- of Fairfax. S. D., who had lived 18 years in mid- America and were returning to the mid-Europe whence

■ they came. Op their way to the i 'dock to board the boat which wa to start the in back to I'lechoSI-'V- i akia they became separated- when : between litem. ' Eighteen years in South Dakota j i - and this ur,- Americanised woman : v vii. without eunuch' language t- , '• find hot way b.wk lit the' d-ck.-, Under the strain of four and help- • lossne.-s. -he died In the jtellevue ' Hospital. >• For 1- yeflis these ,-traneeiI- had lived i« our tend with no love ' y or thought of America except as it a good thing to !*■ used by them I. that they could return to their • ■f foreign home with the gain they is got here. o We think of America a- the it great, well educated country. We 9- have the l*st school system in all j r (he world, yet we stand ninth * among the nations of the world in ■ r literacy. There are five millions of illit- " erntos in the United States over; e ten years of age. The war intelligence tests disclosed the start-, y ling fact that 20'; of our populaa ti'on c.-ttinot use the English langf uage so as to unilerstand the writ8 ten won! or to express themselves. >- i',*', of the liberate* .in our cities e are • foreign torn. The foreign

:i l: m Occemt tr 31. 1921 ■ The telephone ha* reached its hiflhest point of efficiency and , utility in the United States, the land of its birth. With only cne-sisttenth of the population cf the world, the United State* has almost two-thlrds of the world's telephones.

■ pre- i keep- the foreigner foreignTi e foreign language pros ■ »> - thi t- unln ha: defended itself on ..the coo..,; that only by talking i a foreign language could we teach.the foreigner American idea- and ! i.lcat:-.- It has ■ defended itself on .the ground that it was the. melt- » ing pot that cjucated the foreign-,',-r into the American. Hut the - records tyovc conclusively that h ' has not taught American ideas »t American ideal- and it has not - ni;tiie these ideals safe i" tbe f hand- of men and women who S think only in a foreign tongue; i w Ito live -Is j cars in tlie heart of r our country fur no eftd hut to r suck its wealth that they may go hack to a foreign home to -spend r that wealth. The foreign langp uagc paper i.- the most. un-Ameri-.1 /is institution tolerated by the li most generous and the most toln erant of people. If their professions he true, the - liest patriotic service that any r; foreign language new spatter can - tender to the United States is to - 1 ga out of business. lVrprtual Calendar _ : Thirsty days hath Septemlter. April. June and Noventlier. " All the re.-t are thirsty too. •" Urte-^jyou make your own home ■ ■I Painting & Paperltanging interior Decorators 401 ASBURY AVENUE OCEAN CITY N. Jimioiic 7.15 *

Master Paul Kirby. the sort .f « „ , . M.s- John II. Kirby of ri1 if , . attained his fourth hiithI, ,,, . , vYcJ lay. and celebrated ® d the :iu-pici'i-s even! in royal style. * n M i -to. Paul invited a nuinls-r of . i.i. W "2 .-•»■ " i- teal Avenue, and then, performed >' e huia-i: -f host as to the manfl nor born. l iro gue a -l the occusion were .. . K D.u by . Junior Brown- „ : , i . .1 Junior Kirby, Mr.-. Roy o i i i.'v . Mrs. Harry I.itle and o m ", „ Herhi-it Brow nice. ■ : The chief attraction was a dc ci

candles. lep cream and randv^^kl fuvors, were in addition serve,!. ■ Master Paul was the happy cipient of some very han-i gifts. The guests depart e,l deri:Mini.l had all enjoyed a most en-l ji.vahle time. Overlooked I Kph— Here's a had iiuarter -,.mel I one passed on nte. An' 1 can't get! rid of the blamed thing. ^ * Hiram— Don't you church? 1 , 1

Gone, But Still Here ! I. JfST STKP ACROSS THE STREET AM) J YOl WILL COME TO . J HUGHES7 CENTRAL PHflRMAGY IN VIEW OF THE PROGRESS OCEAN 5 CITY HAS MADE, TOWARDS BECOMING '! THE METRO 1' O L I S OF .EASTERN RESOK'IS WE FELT IT SHOl'LI) HAVE A 1 METROPOLITAN PHARMACY. HERE WE i ARE JI'ST OPPOSITE THE OLD STANDI ! A MODERN STRCCTI RE. EQITPPED i TO SERVE Ol'R INCREASINGLY LARGE ! CLIENTELE, WITH At 1 THE EXPEDI- I •riON OF A NEW YORK^TAHLISHMENT. Call and See Us! ■■ =^========= * —

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Towns ends WE ! LUMBER YARD 3 / OCEAN CITY N.J. EIGHT ST. at HAVEN AVE. ==^ — - H! L